As usual, this is totally filled with spoilers, so … you’re warned.
Well … I actually watched the “Lost” 2-part season finale last night on terrestrial television (I usually prefer to grab it off the net from an HD capture … widescreen, you know.) Anyway, it was pretty messed up, apart from the unbelievable amount of commercial interruptions … which I’ll have to talk about as well … But, first, there's this ....
... before the program there was the superfluous and stupid “the Answers” special, which is just silly. The producers and writers, who clearly don’t know what the hell is happening any more than anyone else, just recapping the shows three years. I especially love the part when these two Hollywood dorks, sitting in their chairs, say something like ‘and then Charlie says, “hey, guys, where are we?” in the pilot.’ And then they show the clip of the scene and it is only Charlie saying “hey, guys, where are we?” I’m sorry, but that’s just stupid TV. In fact, this is the first of the recap specials I’ve ever watched for a series (Battlestar Galactica and Heroes has had them, too) and I have to admit they are made solely for the dumbest viewers.
Anyway, the 2-parter was pretty interesting. There is the usual flashback thing driving the undercurrent of the program, but it’s a Jack with a long beard who is drinking and addicted to Oxycontin.
Meanwhile, back on the island, lot’s of stuff is coming to a head. Suffice it to say there is the first major victory on the part of the passengers of flight 815 … but, what is going on with Jack’s flashback? And, then … Kate shows up and we know that it’s not a flashback … it’s the future. They are off the island and have some “golden pass” to fly anywhere. Jack flies around hoping to crash again, saying they never should have left the island.
Woah … What the hell does that mean? If they left the island, then all the stuff with Jack was a flash-forward. When he was on the plane and given a newspaper, he freaked out and was going to kill himself. Then, later, he goes to the funeral and he’s the only person who turns up. Who was it in the newspaper and the coffin? Not his ex-wife, who is pregnant and very much alive.
But, Charlie looks like he might have died. Can’t see him getting out of that, but then again … who knows. After getting to the Looking glass station, the eye patch guy shows up. Desmond shows up and kills him. But, he isn't dead ... and he's got a granade.
They find out that the boat off the coast was not sent by Desmond's girlfriend. Charlie has a breif contact with Penny before seeing eye patch guy with the granade and locks the chamber to save Desmond. So, who is the woman from the helecopter?
Lost is still the weirdest show on TV. You may think it’s all a bit of a gimmick (and it is) but I’d take chaos over repetition any day.
Anyway, a 2-hour program that probably lasts 33 minutes. Every other commercial was for some gigantic truck! I sort of couldn’t believe what I was watching. MASSIVE vehicles in the middle of a gas crisis. What the fuck is that about? I’m not kidding, people are pretty pushed to the limits here and this is the 3rd straight summer for record busting prices. Almost everyone is taking this very seriously. My favorite commercial was for some 4x4 monster called “The Patriot” … What? It’s patriotic to buy a monster vehicle that probably gets like 9 miles to the gallon? David Cross was right: we are a nation of 6 year olds. “The Terrorists hate our Freedom ...”
OK, so you might have noticed a distinct lack of Spider-mania here on the old website. Well, I haven’t seen the film. I’m utterly disinterested, frankly. Something about Spiderman (these movies, anyway) just doesn’t do it for me. I can’t explain can’t explain it. They aren’t bad and they do capture the essence of the comic, but I can’t seem to care about Toby McGuire. He’s just too … weird. Pirates opens this weekend, as well, but school gets out today and it will be mobbed … I’ll let you, faithful readers, know what I see or don’t see.
I’ll try and jot some notes on the season endings of “24” and “Heroes” from the other night. Both were great, but left me feeling a bit flat.
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